Chasing Girls: May the Best Man Win

Who runs fastest, throws farthest, jumps highest? For sure, guys are very competitive, especially when it comes to romance. Here are some common situations you may run into and how to handle them.

Situation 1
You wonder what it would be like to go out with different girls, including your best friend’s steady girlfriend. You might even have a crush on her. That’s understandable if she’s the first girl you’ve talked to and spent time with.

No matter how experienced or inexperienced you are there’s not always a clear line between being friends with a girl and having romantic feelings for her. Even so, you need to remember that this particular girl is off-limits. Make sure nothing you do or say sends any other message. Aside from the fact that her boyfriend is your best buddy, it’s just not the right thing to do. Back off and leave her alone.

Situation 2
You and your best friend both like the same girl. This is a tough situation that requires you both to show some maturity; if your friendship is to survive, that is. Begin by admitting you both have romantic feelings about her. Lots of times, important details that affect friendships go unsaid between guys. Don’t let that happen to you.

In a way, it’s kind of funny, but not too surprising, that you both like her. You guys hang out all the time, think alike, and have the same tastes, so why wouldn’t you go after the same girl? Have a few laughs about it. Let the situation play out. She may choose to go out with you, your friend, or neither of you. No matter what happens, the main idea is to keep a cool head and remember who’s your best friend.

Situation 3
You really like your best friend’s girlfriend and she likes you. They haven’t been getting along and you figure they’ll break up soon. If they do, so be it. Just make sure you’re not the reason it happens. Stepping in before they break up will betray your friend’s trust in you and wreck the friendship.

If and when they do separate - and after she’s had time to get over him - you can go after her with a clear conscience. No matter the timing, though, just remember it may still affect you and your buddy’s friendship.

Situation 4
There’s a guy in your science class that won’t leave your girlfriend alone. It’s clear he’s trying to steal her away from you. Before confronting him, step back and look at how your girlfriend acts when he’s around. If she discourages his advances by ignoring him and telling him “I have a boyfriend,” then you don’t have to worry. Be supportive of her. After all, she can’t help it if he finds her attractive.

If she’s flirting and leading the guy on then you have a decision to make. Your choices are simple: live with it, change it, or leave. If you’re like most guys you won’t put up with her flirting for long, especially if it’s clear she’s looking around for a new boyfriend. You can ask her to change, but it’s not likely to happen if she’s already made up her mind. That leaves you with the last option: go your own way and don’t look back.

Something to think about: If a girl runs around on her boyfriend with you, it’s a good bet she’ll do it again - except next time it’ll be you she’s running around on.

Boy's Guide to Girls: 30 Pointers You Won't Get From Your Parents or Friends (Paperback and eBook)

+Boy's Guide to Girls